Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Overcoming inertia

I love that it is 9:45 and we've already had an absolute downpour, had the sun come out, and now the skies are clear and blue and beautiful. Ah yes, this is my kind of day, where I can enjoy the sun doubly because we've already had some rain today. Yesterday I was not so lucky. I went for my 3-mile walk in the afternoon. It had already rained but the sky was still gray and heavy. I grabbed my umbrella as I headed out and managed to get most of the way through without having to use it, but that last half mile or so it started to rain -- thankfully a light, misty rain, but rain nonetheless. I was so relieved, pleased, proud that I had chosen to walk anyway. It wasn't that long ago that a rainy day would have been more than enough excuse not to leave the house, and considering I was still coming out of my funk, it showed substantial more motivation than I thought I had.

This past week has been really interesting to me, as I've managed to observe myself in the midst of my behaviors and subtly shift what I've always done to something different. What I've always done is let a funk absorb me, depress me, derail me. What was different was that there were still pockets of motivation, moments of productivity, rays of light that kept me at least partially on course in spite of inertia's best efforts to the contrary. Not to mention the unsmall feat of not beating myself up anywhere near as much as I usually do for the moments where I was off course, sitting on the couch eating chocolate and watching copious amounts of silly television.

This is what progress looks like. Most of the time it isn't great leaps and bounds, onward and upwards. It's making small changes, little shifts, and acknowledging yourself for making the effort, noticing the results however wee they may be. Each moment has its own challenges, its own choices, its own ups and downs, its own little victories. The trick is to be aware, to pay attention, to recognize what is happening inside you and around you, and to be grateful both for the awareness and the shift that is taking place. I feel like so much is happening right now, like everyday is full to overflowing even when on paper it doesn't look like I'm doing very much at all. But I can see the progress, in a way I've never been able to do before, and it is truly amazing.

What things do you notice when you pay attention? What are the little ways that you can shift what is happening in your life today? What are you grateful for? I can almost guarantee that the inertia will dissipate when faced with questions like these. There's no place for it to hide when you shine the light. Namaste.

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